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Writer's pictureJoëlle de Boer

Waiting... Waiting... and waiting again

Is it weird? I only just knew your name, but you probably don't know mine. Every year until eternity, I don't know for how long I get the chance to get to know a new brother or sister. At the moment it is a brother who has turned 16 years old and from who we don't know if he still has full brothers or sisters. Right now I only know your name brother of mine. I feel like you are so close but actually so far away because I only know your name and I don't know what you look like.


I look up your firstname on Facebook (No stalk😂) and look at the long list of all boys and girls who have your name. I am the first to see people who have mutual friends with me and look at some guys. Will you be in there?

I really don't like the fact that I can't contact you until you've met our donor father. On the one hand, I get it because then you can experience the meeting with our donor father yourself, but on the other hand I would like to introduce you to our brothers and sisters and I would like to know who you are. I thought it would go a little faster for you this time than it was for me, but apparently it will be a long time before I can meet you.


The chance is 1 in a million that you are among the guys that I watched who were at the beginning of my search results and that you have Facebook at all, the chance is 1 in 10. So unfortunately I have to be patient and like I said to my half brothers and sisters I have almost no patience.


Unfortunately, the Fiom psychologist is not being nice to me. I asked her if they would like to keep me informed. When you would have your psychological conversation. And I wanted to ask her to ask you some questions like whether you have any siblings. But then before I could even ask her, she sent me an app that I shouldn't text her that often and that she will notify her if she knows more. I mean, but she passed on info from another brother that was meant for me too late. She sometimes (often) forgets things. And often texting? I had just sent 3 texts in a few weeks that I knew that a new brother wanted to contact.


I would like to ask minister schippers of public health and sports to ensure that, just like in America, where they have a donor sibling registry, there is a site in the Netherlands where half siblings can come into contact with each other before they have contact with their donor father. Because that is still the case in the Netherlands that it is not possible to get contact details of half brothers and sisters before your 16th birthday. You will only receive this after you have met your donor father.


And I want to make contact with half brothers and sisters possible earlier. So Minister Skipper would like to send me a message so that we can get together to put together a plan. No more waiting game for other donor children in the future.


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